Field Monitor

Two field monitors waited for someone to pass by. There were many cicadas about making their wondrous noises blending in and out of the bursts of wind. One fellow who popped out of the wood about 300 yards in the distance made his way to where the monitors stood. As he got closer they noticed he had jerking limp, almost as if a puppeteer had something to do with the way he walked.
“Hello, stranger, have you got a pass?”
“No, I don’t think I want to come this-a-way. I think I should be going that-a-way.”
And his leg jerked out.
“Oh dear,” said a monitor.
“Look at my foot!”
And as sure as there is a good time to be had somewhere else, this fellow had a fishing lure stuck to his shoe and was being reeled in.
“I was a little sheepish at first. But anyhoo.”
And he limped on past the monitors, turned around and goes,
“Happy Stoopid Day! You assholes!” and he pulled the lure out of his shoe and limped away a little more, falling over himself and landing limp-style on top of a sheep and stayed there for a very long time.