That Ol’ Bear

This bear named Charles ate a carp and swallowed it whole like a snake will do a mouse. The bear became sheepish, seeing a hunter man and tried to explain his folly by growling lowly and tilting his head side to side as if to say,

“Its so bony and not as good as a salmon.”

The man didn’t understand and shot the bear in the shoulder.

The bear growled, “Ouch” and was shot again.

“Ouch”, he growled again.

It turns out that the hunter’s name was also Charles.

The only word a bear can say out loud besides “No” is the word “Oh.”  Charles the hunter couldn’t tell the difference because he didn’t give the bear any credibility to a vocabulary.

This misunderstanding quickly became overshadowed because  a vampire in a bear costume overtook Charles the hunter, sucked him dry, and threw his carcass into the river where it was mistaken for a carp by another bear whose name was Jeff.

Jeff the bear was shot by Jeff the hunter who was drained by the vampire. This repeated again and again until the cycle had finished the circle of common names to the chorus of bears saying “oh”.