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Bonnarooooooooo!
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The Man with Almost Tremendous Foresight
I played 2 shows on Saturday. One was in Red Bank, NJ and the other was in New York City. The second one was easy because I was to sit in with Mr. Brownstone on a song for their last show ever to be had in NYC. The only thing was, I kept forgetting the words to Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door. It should be easy, like who played Uncle Buck, but for some reason I always forget.
It was on the J train to Bowery where I was trying to remember the second verse to this song when a man came into my car and started playing it. I hadn’t even prayed for it, yet and didn’t know I was going to. I looked for some money to give him but didn’t have any. I mean I did, but I needed the ten.
He got to the second verse and I began to remember the words quicker than he sang them (music therapy is a good memory extractor) but I still couldn’t remember the third line. And when the dude got to the third line, he mumbled it. Like when God made fool’s gold for the prospector, Yiminy.
And then, as he walked out of the subway car to the next, he said something in my direction but I couldn’t tell if he was talking to me or the other guy sitting near me. He said, “If you wear something like that outside, your gonna get knifed.” I’m glad I didn’t get stabbed because I was wearing white pants.
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Two Dudes Helping Out
Fortune Dave confessed to making placating concessions to his doorman, Undisclosed Steve. Steve eats salads that Dave makes at home and in return Steve acknowledges that Dave has a place to live. Code Red Days are the days that Steve requests a Dagwood salad. Those days, Steve will stand by the door for the duration of the meal. The rest of the day is spent at Steve’s own place where he plays Worlds of Warcraft, all day, sometimes explaining to other warriors at the bar what a Dagwood is. Once, when all the warlocks were listening at a nearby table, they looked up from their ales at Fortune Dave, who then made his confession.
Then, there was Vampire Pokey, who was teeming with dead blood. Where and when he showed up depended on who was in need of a party favor and Pokey loved to give. Other vampires gave him the Dorian Gray look- you know, that vampiric looking down and closing eyes while turning back to the important party.
There was a gaggle- no wait- a murder of mummies who were never royalty but just experiments of a long gone indigenous group of people who had heart. Pokey gave them dead blood all the time.
And when Horse Day came-the day when parades provided tired Clydesdales for the chumley vampires- Pokey didn’t hang around for idle chit chat (“Oh, did you see the jockey that Chauntey killed? He said he was like the end of a milkshake.”) Pokey went to the mummies and gave them some dead blood from his wrists and then spent quality time with them, learning about berry picking and shell jewelry and sometimes just burning one of them in order to transfer the spirit to a wildcat. That kind of thing.