Category Corn Mo’s Boring Life


I recorded last night.  It’s been a while.  Two other bands have been recording at the same studio so I had to find holes in the studio’s schedule since those bands are better at planning ahead than I am.

I laid down a banjo track on Thank You.  I’m terrible on banjo.  And my banjo kept going out of tune.  But it worked out.  Then, Dave put a bass track on Old Man.  I had a Reason track laid down already but wanted it to be a real bass.   We did two tracks of the bass to be panned in both speakers.  But then scrapped it.  We’ll redo the bass on Thursday. 

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Axl Rose

I had a great night last night.  I did a show at the Ars Nova Theater called Automatic Vaudeville.  I like doing these variety shows.  It’s cool to hang out with other performers.  On the bill was a band called Sin Destroyer, At Least It’s Pink, the VIDS, Neal Medlyn, Dirty Martini, and Billy Willing.

They do you well there in the backstage:  pizza, m&m’s (both kinds), beers, carrots, pringles.  If I was doing magic instead of singing I would have had pizza and beer.  Guess what card you’re thinking of?  Magic.

I played two songs and went back to cage, as they say.  After the show I went to meet my lady at Show, where the vaudeville is high class, as they say in Grapevine.

Victoria Secrets had a party at Show with lots of dancing ladies on pedestals...

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Driving in Ireland

Driving in Ireland is really fun, especially in the south.  There aren’t many long stretches.  It’s a lot of curves on tiny roads.  Some two lane roads are the size of our one lane roads and some one lane roads are the size of driveways.  Sometimes I had to just pull over and let the other car go by.  Shift on the left.  Drive on the left.  Good fun.
And there’s a lot of sheep who have the right of way.  Sheep everywhere.  And stray dogs.  Sweet dogs with sad eyes.  An owned dog ran beside my car as I was up to 30 mph.  I’m told dogs that still have their balls can do that. I have a friend who bought his dog neuticles, silicone balls for your neutered dog.  I don’t know how fast he ran.

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There’s a good scene going on in Belfast.  At least to me there is.  Lots of folks came to the show.  I played at the Menagerie, a good bar with good people and good beers.

The band, Son of Shrimp, invited me to play with them.  They are awesome with the prog rock.  Really nice fellows.  The other fellow, John Cairns, was good, also.

Jimmy and his new wife, Georgie, came and brought some of my new fast friends from Jimmy’s wedding.  This one guy, Brendan, looks like Robin Leach and has the mannerism of the great Steve Porter.

rleach.jpgThe way Brendan looks. On the right.

We had played trivia at the Farmers Inn the previous night and I gave him answers like a traitor because he’s that cool.

blazingsad55.jpgI gave him Cleavon Little. He came to my show.

Jimmy gave us a ride around Belfast...

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When I played soccer (or football, depending on how you talk out loud) in the 3rd grade, we voted for a team name.  One dude, who talked too much, wanted The Sweathogs.  I wanted that, too.  Another fellow liked The Rowdies. Another fellow wanted The Strykers.  The dude for the Sweathogs kept pacing saying "Sweathogs" so much that Coach Kennison told him to shut up and that we were not going to be called The Sweathogs.  The team was called the Rowdy Strykers. 

The MTA workers went on strike today.  I’m going home today.  I hope that’s good timing.

soccer.gifrobot soccer

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Weekend of Other People’s Shows

On Friday, I saw Todd Barry and Andy Kindler on Friday for one of those Comedy Central Presents.  They both killed.  They’re killers.

todd-barry.jpgfor your wallet-size

On Saturday, I saw my friend, Dave, play.  He was Izzy from Brownstone and played an acoustic set of his own material.  Good times.  Good songs.  He has no cd’s nor a website so you’ll have to have my hearsay alone.

"Thanks so much for coming out to my show Saturday – it really meant a
lot to me. I was not expecting so many people to show up and neither
were the people working there. When I was soundchecking the sound guy
was all "hey, maybe people will hear your guitar and come upstairs and
stay for a song or two…then at least you’ll have a few people in the
room."  Then you guys were all "hey, we’re here for the show" and I was like "yeah!"

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Letter from a Brownstone

Dear Axl Rose,

I am sorry that I used your likeness on stage this weekend.  I was you not only in New York but in Boston as well.  I wore a kilt like you did and a bandana like you did and grew a beard like you did and tried to sing like you did.  But if you were Elvis, I would have been Aloha Elvis, which I like better than young Elvis. 

I used cheat sheets for all the songs that I thought I knew.  You write so many words and its hard to remember.  I apologize.  But, boy oh boy, you should have seen the mess of notes at the end of the night.  It looked like I was reading old timey data sheets in the rain.  You see where I’m going?

I also didn’t drink the sweet tea that was offered to me.  But, in that I think I was straight on with you.

Oh, and by the way, I don’t know what road you pave...

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Dawdlin’: Sitting in With Mr. Brownstone

We had Mr. Brownstone practice on Saturday.  Those songs are awesome to sing.  I gotta learn the words.

I had three nosebleeds on Saturday.  One of them occurred when we were playing “You Could Be Mine”.   I was reminded today of the nosebleed while looking over my notes as there were specks of dried blood all over the page.  That day, I kept going because a) we were renting a rehearsal space and b) it just seemed so badass to sing and bleed.

I remember giving an “It’s alright” look to “Izzy’s” concerned look.  It was especially awesome on the bridge.  Oh, these words tasted like blood:

“While you’re breakin’ down my back
and I been rackin’ out my brain
It don’t matter how we make it
cause it always ends the same
you can push it for more mileage but your flaps are wearin thin
i cou...

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My friends, Will and Emily, were in town.  We met at the Met and looked at art.  I should go there more often than I do now.  When I moved to NY, I told myself I should go to the Natural History Museum every Saturday.  I haven’t been in 2 years.  

forest at winter.jpg  The Forest in Winter at Sunset, 1845–67
Pierre-Étienne-Théodore Rousseau (French, 1812–1867)

I also told myself to go see more theater and I haven’t.  My friend, Nick, came to town and got me a free ticket to see Doubt.  The theater is nice and you can drink beer at your seat which is a plus.  John Patrick Shanley wrote a really good play.  He also wrote Joe Versus the Volcano, a fine film that lovingly shows off Long Island City and Abe Vigoda.

fish3.jpgwarm hearted, who farted?

Back to Saturday, I tried to take Will and Em and Jasper and Josh and Una...

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I saw Willie Nelson last night.  He’s so good.  He played "Angel Flying too Close to the Ground."  What a beautiful song.

I sat in with Brave Combo the night before.  They’re one of the best bands ever.  Influenced John and John, me, and are one of Denton’s Finest.  So, is this guy.

vonerich.jpgThe Golden Warrior

Call this number!  510.351.7654!

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What I’m Listening to

I don’t usually write what I’m listening to because most of my friends think I have a terrible taste in music and don’t want to know.  But today I got to listen to a couple of cool cds.  A friend of mine that I met at a TMBG show gave me a cd he had just finished.  It’s handmade, including the packaging.  And it’s really good.  Hopefully, he’ll have a myspace site up to share some of them.  His name is Jimmy Dority.  He’s really good.

And then my roommate let me borrow "The Best of Free Design".  They do a cover of "You Are My Sunshine", one of the best songs ever written.  I got a little teary. 

freedesign.gifthe free design

Well, there’s that.  And then, I finally found Andrew Schroeder songs.  He was the french horn player in the Polyphonic Spree...

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My friend needs help

My friend Jen is about to be deported. If she does, my friend and former roommate, Dave, will have to leave the country, also, because she is his wife, his friend for life. In the meantime, Jen can’t visit her relatives because then she’ll never be able to come back to the states.
Jen and Dave are filmmakers. You can click on the Bigfoot link to the right to see Dave’s work.
You can click on this site to get more info:
I don’t know the complete history of the legislation involved but I think that back in ’96, a Texas congressman introduced a bill that would allow deportation above a judge’s ruling.
These are good folks doing some cool things and I don’t want them to leave.

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Bus Adventure

I went to visit my girlfriend in Atlantic City the other day. She does the motorcycle/trapeze act at the Steel Pier. Here’s the part about my awesome bus ride.
Getting there:
I take the Academy bus from Port Authority. It’s $29 round trip but depending on what casino you get dropped at, you get at least $17 back. (Get dropped off at the Tropicana or Showboat. You get cash and not a gamble card , with all your info given away.) I gambled $5 on video poker. I won 3.50 and then lost it all. That’s the way it goes. I don’t have gamble magic. Tim Delaughter does. He wins all the time. But, I’m cool losing a five.
Anyway, my bus stops at the Cheesequake rest area for a second pickup. There’s not enough room for everyone...

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Sorry about Seaports

For those that came out to the show Saturday night expecting a full show, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I was supposed to do a 30-45 minute set and was told 15 minutes before I went on that it was going to be a 3 song set. I had my piano and drummer with me and had to leave those offstage. After hearing some lamentations from folks after the set and from those who missed it completely due to the debacle (what a lovely word) I decided to treat myself to an Italian ice. Cherry. And it was tasty. But for real, I feel a little showtime blue balls (I don’t know how else to put it). So, I’m hoping to do a set, soon. Keep watching the site because I may get one this week.
Ding Dong,
The Giants are very gracious.

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Online Gaming Eavesdrop

I heard this on my computer’s speakers today. I couldn’t tell what game it was but I think it was Divine Intervention. This is what my computer picked up:

Let’s go let’s go
Divine intervention
I can’t move him
What the hell
I didn’t think you could cast with that shit
God dammit Leroy
You moron Leroy
Not my fault
We do have cyst on don’t we?
Leroy you are just stupid as hell
We got fried chicken
(and then it was gone)

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My Uncle Kicked Ass on the tv

My Uncle Nathan was one of many who discussed the best way to preserve the Declaration of Independence. It was like a monster garage show but a little more serious. Although there were some people that performed for the camera. That’s why I can’t watch reality shows. That fake arguing or elevated arguing for the camera is bothersome.
But my uncle stood his ground on the real argument. They all wanted an airtight casing and made a good design to do so. But, Nathan wanted to frame the sealed casing with pockets filled with silica gel to regulate the humidity. The others argued if it were airtight you wouldn’t need the gel. (This gel is what you find in packaging like a sugar packet.)
I’m no scientist. Not even an amateur...

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Rock Circus Practice

Like building a model rocket- you spend days making it and then take it to the park. It’s going to either be spectacular or a dog is going to bite it and chew on it and then bury it.

I started working with this girl, Irene, on the rock opera. It was weird having someone else sing a song I wrote. I had to let go and let her take the wheel and drive. Like building a model rocket- you spend days making it and then take it to the park. It’s going to either be spectacular or a dog is going to bite it and chew on it and then bury it. Well, it was spectacular. Irene took the torch and high-fived her coach at the finish line.
I’m gonna write another for her to sing.

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a cougar can take a rabbit

The receptionist I work with is taking off next week to lay down some tracks. He raps. His name is BRock. You can pronounce it either way. I hope he goes far. He’s real nice.
He told me his producer told him to rhyme about escalades and shit he can’t afford. Now he’s told to rhyme about the ghetto.
He had a rhyming dictionary up on his computer.
“things that rhyme with -ain”
“Castles of Spain”
“woodworking plane”
I really hope he uses one of those two options that are really on this site.
I helped him a little and got him going. He got really excited. He told me what he was going to write about and I told him he was already writing it as I repeated it back to him. Write it down.
Oh, and fuck escalades...

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Damn Candy

Man, if anyone lives in NYC and wants to start a soccer team, let me know. Because fat soccer players either die or get thin. I have a Leeds shirt I can wear and that will inspire me to win.

Dammint. I just had a M-azing bar from the snack machine. I did really well yesterday by eating well but sucked today by getting a hot dog lunch and a poor candy chaser. I’m turning into a shit machine. And my gym just upped their rates. I hope nobody goes there so they’ll go back down on their price.
You know what sucks about a 65 cent candy bar? Is that the level of joy is lower than the level of reprisal. My desk faces the damn machine. I’ll prove it. From left to right:
sun chips(french onion)
dipsy doodles
chex mix
wheat thins
snyders pretzels
fantasy mix
welch’s fruit shits
some coo...

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My Brother’s Kids

It’s not how many freethrows you make it’s how you got to the freethrow line.
And that you can make a freethrow. And Ben Stiller’s making some freethrows.

I thought that whenever I have a kid I’m going to let him or her watch television all the time. My reference point for success was Ben Stiller. He watched a lot of tv as a kid and if he hadn’t there would be no Heatvision and Jack. He is the Cable Guy. In a good, productive way.
I heard some radio guy in London dismissing him but you know what? It’s not how many freethrows you make it’s how you got to the freethrow line.
And that you can make a freethrow. And Ben Stiller’s making some freethrows.
Anyways, my brother has two kids and they love books. They get to watch videos every once in a while but that’s it...

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