• Making Fun of the One in Tights

    In the superhero scene it’s hard to one-up someone when all you have is the ability to change yourself into a pile of clothes.  It’s a defense mechanism, which in the superhero world is viewed as being weak.  I’ve always hated my ability because I’m too special to be considered normal and yet, not special enough to be considered “super”.
    Yesterday, that all changed.
    Five superheroes and myself were arrested for conspiring to put beer kegs in the nuclear cooler at the local plant.  Since they put us in superhero confinement, there was no way for the “real” superheroes to get out since they super-proofed it.   At one point in the evening, I changed my appearance to look like The Flash’s clothes and then later into a correctional officer’s clothes and then I fell into a passing laundry cart, changing again into a regular pile of clothes.  It was a classic move as the cart was pushed into the back of a laundry truck which was driven to an industrial laundry plant. I walked out of there looking exactly like Matthew Broderick’s pile of clothes in Glory.